For those of you who have been following my blog, you know that I am currently in the middle of several books. One of the things I'm trying to do to improve my life (post to come about this...) is to spend 20 minutes each day reading. I haven't been doing a great job of keeping up with that so far, but I'm hoping that I'll have more time to organize my life after I'm done working my second job (post about that to come as well).
So last night, at 12:30, while I was waiting for my phone to update to iOS 7 (which I don't think I like, btw) I decided to pick up one of my books and use the time a little more productively. Then I had to muddle through the question "which of the 9 (or is it 10?) books that I'm reading do I want to choose?" Based on the fact that it was late, I was tired, and which books were and were not easy to read and digest, (and the fact that it's bright orange) I picked up Craig Groeschel's The Christian Atheist.
Let me give you a little background on this book. The subtitle says "believing in God, but living as if He didn't exist." Really grabs the attention (along with the bright orange mentioned above). In each chapter, Craig goes through various struggles in the Christian life and how so often we act like God isn't really there even though we profess that we have a relationship with Him. With titles like "When you Believe in God but are Ashamed of Your Past", "When you Believe in God but don't Think He's Fair", and "When you Believe in God but not in His Church", this book candidly looks at how we've strayed off course and with many personal anecdotes, how we can retrain ourselves to start living like God exists.
After settling into my reading nook with hot tea in my giant mug, I opened the book and looked at the chapter. "When you Believe in God but not in Prayer." Well that's silly. I thought to myself. Of course I believe in prayer. Guess I'm not gonna get much out of this chapter.
Boy was I wrong. There was a ton of stuff in this chapter that I identified with and within no time had a lot of stuff floating around in my mind that I needed to ponder; areas of my prayer life that needed examined. Craig examined various ways we live as if we don't actually believe in prayer. He shared the story of how his children really wanted a dog, and he told them to pray about it, and if it was God's will, to ask Him for wisdom in finding the right dog for their family.
At this point, as probably a lot of you, I was thinking yeah, ok. Why would you bother God about a dog for your family? Do you really expect him to answer prayers like that? And that's when it hit me. I believe in God, but not in prayer. I know the right "answers" about prayer in my head. I know that we are supposed to come to God about everything. But I don't live it. I don't practice it. I don't come to God with the day to day practicalities. I don't want to "bother" him with the trivialities of everyday life.
The rest of the story goes something like this: Craig's kids prayed that night that if God wanted, He would help them to know what dog to add to the family. Oh, the faith of a child. The next day a puppy was abandoned close to the Groeschel's home, and found it's way to their yard. And that dog has been a member of the family ever since.
We don't pray, because we don't honestly believe God will answer our prayers. Or, because we are afraid that he will.
Or because we feel inadequate.We don't pray because we don't think God will listen to our "um...hey God, it would be really awesome if you could get me gas money. I need to get to work everyday but prices are crazy and I just can't afford it." type prayers. We think that if don't pray with the right speech, the right Elizabethan phrasing using Thee and Thou, that God will turn a deaf ear to us.
Craig explains our need to come to God honestly this way:
Jesus never criticized [in Scripture] prayers that were honest, only those that were long and showy. As a parent, I'd much prefer my young children to climb into my lap and speak honestly. "Daddy, I'm afraid of the dark. Would you help me?" Imagine the same child standing before me and addressing me thus: 'Grand, omnipotent father of the household, I beseech your presence. Great provider of all I have, grant me Thy presence through the long watches of the night, for lingering fears beset me--verily, until dawn's first rays alight my heart with hope.
I don't know about you, but I need to spend a lot more time praying honestly, than planning out the right "Christian lingo" to use and have my prayers become fake. Hey, if you are one that normally speaks poetically, by all means, pray to God that way.
The point is, pray honestly. Pray often. Pray with belief that God hears and answers, even if the answer is not what we were looking for. Even writing this post, I've been challenged again.
So what about you? Do you Believe in God but not in Prayer?
-A.A.
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