I came across an opinion article the other day regarding the way women dress and if that effects the possibility of sexual harassment or violence. You can read that article here.
Now, let me start off by saying, I don't agree with every single nuance of what this author wrote. I think that there is line of appropriateness, and that a certain amount of modesty is necessary. That is not the topic of discussion here.
Let me also add that I believe the school referenced in the article was justified in their actions, to the extent that a dress code was given prior to the dance that all students were aware of. It was a school function, so it stands to reason that school rules are still applicable. I remember always having a dress code for school dances. It wasn't as strict as the every day dress code, but it was still there. It's just the way life works when you're in school. Going to that dance was a privilege, not a right. However, whether this school was right or wrong, and the degree of modesty that teens should adhere to is also not the topic of discussion here.
One final disclaimer of sorts: Please understand that I know that not all victims of rape are female. I'm not trying to make this a gender biased issue. However, statistically speaking 1 out of 6 women are victims of rape, as opposed to 1 out of 33 men. So, while it is certainly a heinous act for any person to be raped, the perspective of my opinion is from the majority female point of view. However, all of the same ideas present here apply to male victims as well.
What gets me is the level of responsibility placed on us females to not get raped, instead of putting the responsibility on men to not rape. Why am I told to not wear certain clothes, or not say certain things, or not act certain ways to keep myself from getting raped, instead of telling men that they are responsible for their own actions, regardless of any variables.
Let's apply the same logic to another situation in order to see how ridiculous this is: Want to not get hit by a dunk driver? Don't travel anywhere in a vehicle. Instead of telling people not to drive under the influence, let's tell everyone to avoid being victims by not driving or riding in cars.
Want to keep your house burglar free? Make it look really trashy and own nothing of value. Instead of teaching people no to rob, we should all just take responsibility to make our houses trashy and undesirable.
If in those 2 circumstances we place responsibility on the perpetrator and not the victim, why do we do the opposite with rape?
I liked how the author brought up children and elderly victims to refute this "you brought this on yourself" mentality. You cannot possibly tell me that a child is sexually assaulted because of his or her own actions. She also brings up the point that victims of sexual violence are of every age, gender, appearance, race, etc. No victim is responsible for rape because of what he or she does, says, wears, or looks like.
Now, that doesn't mean that girls have a free pass to act stupidly. Obviously, we need to use our heads. Common sense needs to be applied to certain situations. But rape is never the fault of the victim.
You should read the article, as the author brings up some other good points (again, I don't agree with every single thing she says). But let me quote her in closing: So enough with questions like "Do you think girls dress in a way that invites trouble?" Such questions only give rapists what they're looking for: an excuse for violence.
Let's put blame where blame is do, instead of shaming the victims of sexual violence. The problem is the perpetrator, not the victim.
-A.A.
