...or, 5 Really Bad Reasons to Leave Your Church.
Isn’t social media great sometimes? Sure, it has its share
of problems…narcissism and needless (and sometimes endless) drama abound. But
it can be a great platform to catch up with friends and family that live far
away, or to share your thoughts, convictions and inspirations with others.
So here we go. 5 Really Bad Reasons to Leave Your Church:
1. 1. “I’m Not Being Fed” – I love the way the author
addresses this point, so let me defer to him to begin my discussion of this
point: “Your primary call in the church is to contribute, not just to consume.
As a Christian, you shouldn’t require spoon-feeding for the rest of your
life…Remember, your call is not just to be a disciple, but to make disciples.”
Wow. What an in-your-face statement. We live in a society that is all about me.
Chances are good that if you go to a good, Bible-preaching church and you
aren’t being fed, the problem doesn’t lie with the pastor.
Pew-sitters. Since taking over the
direction of the Children’s Programs at my church with one of my closest
friends, I have experienced more and more the problem with getting people to do
things in the church. It’s always the same ones serving week after week, on the
worship teams, teaching in the classrooms, and helping with the maintenance and
upkeep of the ministry and grounds. When did we adopt the mindset that my
primary function in the church is to sit in the pew and be ministered to,
instead of being a partner and conveyor of ministry? Where do we see people
that just showed up, did their time, and then left in early church History?
Everyone has a part to play. Maybe you can’t sing a note, but you know how to
click a button to run powerpoint. Maybe technology is so not your thing, but
you can drive a van. Maybe the thought of driving a 15-passenger van scares
you, but you can rock babies in the nursery. If you aren’t contributing, you
have absolutely no grounds to complain about not being fed. The church’s primary function is not to cater
to the pew sitters. It is to work together to further the Kingdom.
2. 2. “It’s getting too big” – I don’t really have
much to say about this one. Which I’m sure comes as a relief after the longish
rant that accompanied the first point. Growth can be a good thing, if done in
the proper manner (i.e. staying faithful to the Truth and Great Commission). We
are told to make disciples. Which means adding to our numbers. Which means
growth.
3. 3. “I don’t agree with everything that is being
preached” - If you are looking for a
church where you agree with every word uttered from the Shepherd, you’re going
to be looking for the rest of your life.
Now here’s the thing. There are some major doctrinal issues that need to
be in alignment between you and your church/Pastor. Things like the deity of
Christ, the work of Salvation through Christ alone, the character of God the
Father…these are points on which you should not waiver. But there are other,
secondary theological points that ought not to be sticking points. In the grand
scheme of things, does it really matter if we are saved through election or
free will? No. What matters is that we are saved by the Grace of God through
the finished work on the Cross. Does it matter if you are a literal 6-day
creationist or a deistic evolutionist? No. What matters is that God created the
heavens and the earth. Maybe if we would
spend less time arguing the secondary theological points and more time acting
as the body of Christ, we wouldn’t be hearing things from the world like “I
don’t like the church. They’re all just a bunch of hypocrites.” Or “I like
Jesus, but not the church”.
4. 4. “My Needs aren’t being met” – This one goes
along with the first point with the narcissistic mindset in which we view the
function of the church. Maybe if we spent a little less time on what the church
can do for me, and a little more time on what we, the church, can do in the
world, we wouldn’t need secular organizations to do in our communities, in the
world, what we should be doing. We have dropped the ball on this one, church.
And many times, the world is doing OUR job. Again, let me quote the author,
“The church doesn’t exist to meet your needs. You are a part of the church that
exists to meet the needs of the world. Put away the shopping cart and pick up
the shovel.”
5. Unresolved Conflict – Where there are people,
there will be conflict. There will be different personalities, opinions,
characters. You will NEVER find a church where there isn’t conflict. Why?
Because we are all people. We are all subject to sin time and time again. The
flesh takes over. One day we will be holy, as He is Holy, but we aren’t there
yet, and we will never be there as long as we are on this earth. So there will
always be conflict. If you are looking for a church without conflict, you will
be church hopping the rest of your life.
Now, I understand that there are many complexities not
addressed here. I understand that there are valid reasons for leaving a church.
In my experience, however, the amount of people that leave for valid reasons
are few, and the ones who leave for reasons such as the ones listed above are
many. A lot of times the reasons listed above are an excuse to leave a church
because you were offended by something that was said or done. Let’s spend more
time partnering together as the Church, and less time focusing on me.
Looking for my shovel,
AA
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